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Do you wonder how to actively start the practice of Self Love? Would you like tools to lovingly push away your limiting beliefs? Are you longing for a personalized, action based, guide to a more Self Loving existence? Do you wish there was a customized program that could lead you clearly into the practice of Self Love and away from limiting beliefs? I have been where you are nodding yes to all of these questions around Self Love. I have been trapped in the cycle of selfblame, self-loathing, the heavy weight of no clear action and lack of self-love. Today I am a woman of daily action and service for myself and others. I address and understand my limiting beliefs and help others do the same. I get to do the work daily with myself and those with whom I work. Together we make our world a more self loving place. I am here to help you love yourself into action.
Often the hardest part of starting a new practice is knowing where to begin. Knowing what is required of us to get what we want in life is a basic comfort. We can turn to nature as an example of this. If you watch bees at work harvesting the nectar from flowers, they clearly know where they are headed and why. They know inherently what actions they need to take. Flowers that have nectar ready for the bees have an electrical charge that the bees sense. Once harvested that charge increases so that the bees know the nectar has already been taken. There is an exchange of energy. Together we make your inner light shine brightly through electric charge that is activated through clear self love practices. You and I are like the flowers and bees, we are full of energy that is constantly vibrating and either attracting or repelling other energy around us.
- What does this have to do with self love?
- When you commit to fully loving yourself, you start on the journey to truly knowing yourself.
- What do you get excited about? What changes have you always wanted to make in your life?
- What are the things you value most about yourself? What have you learned from your failures?
- How can we learn from past trauma and pain and, through self love, use this pain as a portal to power?
Activate your self love and tap into the vibration only you can share with the world. I promise the world will respond and give back to you in return. The time to love yourself is now. The time to let your inner light shine brightly is now.
Self-Love is the answer.
Whatever you fear today,
whatever you know is holding you back...face it. Journal or meditate on it, talk to a trusted
person, hire a self love coach, bring that fear into the light of self reflection and self love. Fear
will never stop and it can help us tremendously at times if we let it. First we must face it,
understand it, know it. Fear will always happen, it is what we choose to do with our fears that
will determine how we move forward and who we choose to be. We cannot control the
occurrence but we can control what we do with it. Facing fear can feel scary however if you do
so through the lens of self love, without judgment and with the goal to learn from fear, it can be
an exciting and nurturing experience. If we bottle our fears they have a tendency to grow until
they demand attention. This occurrence is what often leads to the midlife crisis. This is often an
eruption of ignored fears.
Recently I found the following in the notes on my phone.“I think I'm strong and then I have to
stop on the street because I feel as if breathing will make me cry. Just living will cause me to
break down. I have been stripped by this honesty. It is such a relief. It is freeing.” I wrote this on
my second day in recovery during one of the most difficult periods in my life. During a crisis. I
had feared dealing with my debilitating relationship with alcohol for years. This was
compounded by the fact that I used alcohol to escape from my fears. It was a crisis, a deep
cycle of fear feeding the addiction and addiction feeding the fear. Somehow I knew it was
freeing. I knew that the fear I was facing was going to set me free. Today when I hear of
someone having a midlife crisis I have tremendous empathy for them but I also feel excitement
as they are forced to face fears and get to the other side. When in a midlife crisis the fastest
path to the other side is directly through your fears. The easiest way to cut through this path is
with the practice and tools of self love. The crisis is indeed a portal to a new phase.. My midlife
crisis tackled me like a wave. It was the most difficult internal struggle I have ever experienced.
Today I am certain that these moments when I faced my fears are when I nurtured my most
valuable attributes. Many of us suffer from F.E.A.R. and in turn F*ck Everything And Run.
Through my self love work we Face Everything And Rise!
Like the moon, my self love journey has had many phases. It started with “The Midlife Crisis”.
People love to refer to a midlife change or awakening as a crisis. This is actually how the
experience feels when we get blindsided by it. The fear has consumed us and we cannot see
the light, the lesson, the possibly positive outcomes of our crisis. If we label what someone is
going through this way it is instantly bad, shameful and not full of legitimate feelings. Why do
we do this? If we delegitimize this occurrence we do not have to give it too much loving
attention or take a hard look at what is actually going on.We can get away with addressing it
with gossip and sneers instead of facing our fears head on.
“The struggle you're in today is developing the strength you need tomorrow.” -Robert Tew.
This period of change was indeed just that - I changed. I traveled to the other side of my fears.
Honoring and validating these changes and understanding my fears was the beginning of my
self love journey. If you want to know more about this period in my life, tune into my podcast-
The Self Love Peddler Show- where I go deeper. Committing to honoring my changed self was
not an overnight process. One of the hardest parts was accepting other people's reactions to
this new me. They had expectations of who I was. Relationships changed and those who loved
me worked to integrate the new version of Sophie into their lives. Sometimes a friend's crisis
(evolution, change, growth, awakening) can even trigger something brewing in others.
If you know someone who is going through a change, do not be too quick to label and judge it.
Loving a friend through this period of growth and evolution will boomerang right back to you.
That's just how love works.
Everything you have ever wanted is on the other side of fear.
Have you taken the time to connect deeply with yourself and really understand what you value in yourself? Have you heard of Mirror Work? Uncovering what we love and value about ourselves can help us lean into actions and patterns that help to fuel what we value. Recently I hosted a self love retreat. This was a one day event for six women in my New York City space. I designed this experience to be a true retreat. Though we only were together for an afternoon, we retreated into an energetic space of self love and growth. We used our most precious asset, time, to collectively identify our unique personal value and what blocks us from leaning into what we value. We were able to discuss what we value in ourselves and that which we long to release. Everyone at the event participated in their own private mirror work session. Mirror Work is lovingly reconnecting with your body and self through mirror gazing and affirmations. All six women had struggled with body dysmorphia in their lives and mirror work was a huge step for them in alleviating the pain and persistence of body dysmorphia. Many women struggle so deeply to love their exterior. We are bombarded by other peoples’ images of what the “perfect body” is. This fuels the rampant body dysmorphia that plagues so many. Women with whom I have spoken look back at photographs of their younger selves and think, “I looked great then, why didn’t I see it?” These same women continue to struggle to love their bodies today. Somehow they fail to see the pattern on repeat. At this retreat we collectively identified patterns such as this and used tools like mirror work to guide us to alignment with what we truly value about ourselves rather than what outside influences tell us to value in ourselves.
There is no doubt that during the years I struggled to love and accept my body, my “health” choices were fueled by a desire to make my body look unattainably thin. The fashion, diet and exercise culture had hammered this ideal into my head. I was set up for failure. These misguided intentions killed my ability to be consistent. Through self loving mirror work and extensive research and understanding into how we are manipulated by these industries, I now fully love my body as it is today. My body dysmorphia has ended. The visual changes my body may or may not undergo as a result of movement or healthy eating or movement no longer dictate my goals and actions. Being the healthy woman I now know I was meant to be is why I move daily and treat my body with the love and care it is worthy and deserving of. This is my intention. This is part of what I value.
Many experiences in my life were poured into this retreat and into creating the energetic space that encompassed it. At the end of the day, in full recognition and celebration for everything that I've learned from my collective experiences in the world and with others, I was able to say, “I built this retreat. I built this day. I built the scaffolding and framework of this experience. I had this vision, and I brought it to life.” This was of huge personal value to me. Had I never struggled with my own body dysmorphia I would never have been able to add offerings to this retreat that assisted with these emotions. Other people were fundamental in making this day a reality, but knowing that without me it would not exist allowed me to expand my purpose and tap into my value. You know your value. Inside your heart you know what you bring to the world. That knowledge may be hidden under other layers of you, but it is there. Like a treasure waiting to be discovered it is there glowing inside you. One of my favorite parts about the work I do is helping people find that glowing treasure inside of them.
Let's uncover yours together.
